Alright So I really need to watch "Amazing Grace" but just haven't really ever been much of a movie theater type. I'll wait until I can rent it or borrow it from somebody most likely. Two movies I have watched recently however have really made a strong impact and I would like to share some thoughts about them here.
Last night I watched "Blood Diamond" and about a month ago while in Michigan I watched "Tsotsi." Blood Diamond takes place in Sierra Leone and Tsotsi in South Africa. Then of course I read "Not for Sale" in between. I loaned out our house copy of "Invisible Children" to a ICS Wheaton buddy and life is circulating around this issue of child soldiers and extreme poverty in Africa. The movie (BD) ended last night at around 1am and I had to ride home about 15 minutes alone. It may have been the first time I was every freaked out riding at night, alone, all those should be worrisome conditions (you know). I'm starting to learn the basics of sex trafficking and child soldiers. It's totally breaking my heart.
Once again, what I am studying in most of my classes seems secondary to these issues. Why spend so much energy figuring out how to best disciple people in America while there is still so much injustice? I thought about doing my lit review for cross-cultural research today but ended up just checking out books from the library. They are all about holistic ministry in urban settings. It is a tangent from what originally I expected to write and research but it is a tangent that may be necessary in order for me to find motivation to accomplish this major project.
Yesterday I was in a conversation with some very special friends and one of them said something about admiring my heart for missions. This is not something I really asked for or intended to happen. About a week ago I was in a conversation with some other people I highly respect and one of them asked if I had always been like I am, alluding to the missions and compassion for people. No. This isn't me. My desire for my life was to be a successful psychologist who would be able to prove Dr. Phil a fool and write books and be a professor. that would put me in my last year at University of Colorado in Boulder right now working on a huge senior research project on the psychological benefits of altruism. But even without an awareness of the Holy Spirit's work in us I had a prof teach me to pray that my heart break for the things that break God's heart. And now, slowly but surely it seems that everything I once thought and believed is being replaced by understanding I think is more aligned with God's wisdom. Incomplete for sure, but more represent to God. Blessed be God. All praise be to the One who sees the suffering of the invisible around the world. And pray that we all begin to reflect God's love and compassion for the world.